Looking back, sometimes I wonder how I ever made it through college. I didn't wake up every day and ask God to guide and direct my heart. Most of the time I prayed when I needed something like extra perseverance to get through a final exam or safety when traveling. I was absent mindedly walking in my faith and thought just because I attended church that was suffice. I was immature and had a lot to learn about my relationship with God.
Thankfully God never left, he was at my side even when I ignored his agenda and was distracted by my own.
"The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged." - Deuteronomy 31:8.
Fast-forward a couple of years to 2013. I'm a married woman and living a happy, healthy life but a part of me felt as if something was missing. I had a loving family, a nice home, a car, a good job, healthy lifestyle and a loving, supportive husband...so what was it? It took me awhile but I finally opened my heart to hear what God was trying to tell me all along. I thought I could handle each day as it came, apart from the presence, wisdom and grace of God. I was suffering from an independent self-sufficient spirit causing me to be prideful. The Scripture tells us that "God resists the proud" (James 4:6). As I continued to walk in pride, God resisted me and my efforts. I thought I didn't need Him every day. I only sought Him in time of desperation. The Truth is I needed Him. I needed to invite him into my life to live according to His priorities and to fulfill His plan.
Being a self-employed business owner, it is extremely hard to separate business from personal life. I am guilty of thinking they aren't enough hours in the day to complete daily to-do lists. The feeling of being overwhelming is my fault. At the end of the day, I'm left feeling frazzled and stressed. I bring this completely upon myself for God wants us to go to bed every night saying that I finished the work the He gave me to do. The Lord knows my schedule, therefore I need to seek Him to make wise choices throughout the day.
"My Son, if you accept my word and store up my commands within you,
turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding -
indeed, if you call out for insight and cry aloud for understanding,
and if you look for it as for silver and search for it as a hidden treasure,
then you will understand the fear of the Lord
and find the knowledge of God." - Proverbs 2:1-6
Even though my husband and family are VERY important to me, God has to be the top priority. When I am hungry, (which is most of the day) I eat. I can easily stop whatever task I'm working on to grab a snack. Why can't I stop a task to spend time in the Word? I need to feed on the Word to strength my soul for my soul far out lives my physical body.
..."It is written: 'Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God." - Matthew 4:4
I am a person of habit. When I realized that I have selfishly been living all these years without asking Jesus into my day each and every morning, I was living an empty life. I started a morning routine a few months ago and I can honestly say that my life is filled with so much greater inner peace and satisfaction knowing that God is directing me in all I do. With practice, I have developed a morning having of spending time with God in His Word and prayer. This time with Him is special, free of distraction and completely one-on-one. Jesus, himself, had a habit of going off alone to pray.
"Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed." - Mark 1:35
After this time spent with Him, I know I am fully equipped to be fruitful in my day's work. If you haven't made it a priority to spend time with God, I challenge you to do so. Here are some closing thoughts to leave you with:
1. Find a time and place to be alone with God to pray and spend time in scripture. The morning works best with me. I can start my day knowing that I have invited Him into my heart to walk along side me in all I do.
2. Practice makes habit. A habit becomes a priority. Make purposeful time developing your relationship with God your top priority.
3. We desperately need Jesus. Learn to diligently obey and seek Him.
4. God resists the proud. Don't be foolish in believing that you don't need God every day at every moment. He gives grace to the humble. Humble yourself before Him, acknowledging that you cannot make it on your own.
"I rise before dawn and cry for help; I have put my hope in your word." - Psalms 119:147
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